Some People Find Their Way Back to You for a Reason

There are some people who come into your life and leave a mark on you so deep that even time and distance can't erase it.

Amy is one of those people.

We've known each other for almost ten years, and somehow, after everything life has thrown at both of us, we've found our way back to each other.

And I don't think I realized just how much I had missed her until she was back in my life.

Now, our weekly lunch dates are something I genuinely look forward to.

They're not just lunch dates.

They're the part of my week where I get to sit across from someone who knows me.

Someone who has known me for years. Someone who has seen different versions of me, survived my bullshit, listened to my stories, laughed with me, and somehow still decided I was worth keeping around.

There is something incredibly comforting about that.

Today was different.

Today, Amy gave me the honor of being her entertainment while she went to have a biopsy.

There are details about what she's facing that are hers to tell, and I will never take that away from her.

But I will say this:

I was scared for her.

And I think sometimes when someone you love is facing something uncertain, you don't know what to say. You don't know how to fix it. You don't know what the right words are.

So you just stay.

You talk.

You laugh.

You distract them.

You sit beside them.

You make stupid jokes.

You talk about anything and everything so maybe, for just a little while, neither of you has to think about the thing hanging over the room.

And that's what I wanted to do for her today.

I wanted to give her a few hours where she didn't have to carry it alone.

Because the truth is, I don't know what I would do without her.

And writing that makes me emotional because I don't think I've ever really said it out loud.

There were times over the years when I was selfish with my time.

I gave too much of myself to people who didn't deserve it. I prioritized people who wouldn't have done the same for me. I allowed relationships and circumstances to take pieces of my time, my energy, and my attention away from people who actually loved me.

And Amy was still there.

She didn't disappear because I wasn't giving her enough.

She didn't punish me for it.

She didn't stop caring.

She just kept being Amy.

She was there.

And looking back now, that means more to me than I can explain.

Because sometimes you don't realize what you have until life gives you enough distance to see it clearly.

And I see it clearly now.

I have a friend who stayed.

A friend who was there through almost ten years of life.

A friend who somehow found her way back into my everyday life.

And I don't ever want to lose that again.

I don't want to be too busy.

I don't want to take her for granted.

I don't want another ten years to go by wondering why I didn't make more time for someone who deserved it all along.

I want the lunches.

I want the conversations.

I want the ridiculous stories and the serious ones.

I want the laughing-until-we-can't-breathe moments.

I want the days when we solve all of life's problems and the days when we accomplish absolutely nothing except eating lunch and talking shit.

I want the friendship.

All of it.

And let's not forget that Amy apparently had to conduct a two-hour interview of Jet before she decided he was worthy of taking me on a date.

Two hours.

She basically held a congressional hearing on this man's intentions.

And honestly, I respect it.

Because apparently the rule is:

If you can survive Amy's questions, you can handle dating me.

But underneath that joke is something that makes me incredibly grateful.

She cares about me.

She always has.

And today, I hope she knows that I care about her just as deeply.

So tonight, I'm praying.

I'm praying for good results.

I'm praying for peace while we wait.

I'm praying for strength for whatever comes next.

And I'm praying that when we sit down for our next lunch, we're able to look back on today and say, "Well, that was terrifying, but look at us now."

Because I want more lunch dates.

I want more years.

I want more memories.

I want more ridiculous conversations.

I want more life with my best friend in it.

Amy, I don't know if you fully understand what you mean to me.

Maybe I haven't told you enough.

Maybe I haven't shown you enough.

But I want you to know now: You matter to me. More than you know.

I'm so damn grateful we found our way back to each other.

And this time, I'm holding on.

Because some people are worth finding again.

Some people are worth fighting to keep.

And some people become such an important part of your life that the thought of a world without them in it feels impossible to imagine.

You're that person for me.

So whatever comes next, you're not walking through it alone.

You've got me.

And I'm not going anywhere.